


Can we address pizza Friday, please??

by Kivea



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Comedy, Cryle Week 2019, Fluff, Getting Together, High School, Humour, Kinda, M/M, Slice of Life, Texting, because that's what my fics are always about, romcom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-02 05:47:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18804970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kivea/pseuds/Kivea
Summary: For Cryle Week day 1: HeadcanonsNeither of them would describe the other as a ‘close’ friend. An ‘old’ friend was probably more accurate. So it should’ve come as no surprise really that they texted each other with some frequency, especially as they shared some classes. It was perfectly natural.Except ‘some frequency’ actually meant that Craig texted the fiery redhead more than his own real ‘close’ friends.





	Can we address pizza Friday, please??

**Author's Note:**

> Headcanon: they text a lot as teenagers.

Kyle, 23:04  

 _Hey,_ _can you help with the physics homework??_  

Craig, 23:15  

 _We have physics homework?_  

Kyle, 23:16  

 _Dude we ALWAYS have physics homework. I can’t believe you forgot again_  

 Craig, 23:16  

 _I’ve had shit to do who’s got time for physics homework_  

Kyle, 23:17  

 _You LIKE physics_  

Craig, 23:17 

 _Have you done the physics homework?_  

Kyle, 23:20  

 _I mean_  

 _I started it?_  

Craig, 23:21  

 _Filthy hypocrite._  

 _Get out my sight._  

Kyle, 23:21  

 _Seriously tho go start it so you can help me._  

Craig, 23:21  

 _Dude no I’m going to bed._  

Kyle, 23:22  

 _But it’s due tomorrow!!_  

Craig, 23:22  

 _What’s she going to do? Give me detention?_  

 _Too late bitch I already have detention tomorrow._  

Kyle, 23:23  

 _What are you in detention for?_  

Craig, 23:24  

 _You know what Mr Addler’s like._  

Kyle, 23:24  

 _Craig._  

 _Dude._  

 _Stop fucking about in tech class._  

Craig, 23:25  

 _Never._  

Kyle, 23:25  

 _I guess I’ll just struggle through the homework on my own then._  

Craig, 23:36  

 _What the fuck._  

Kyle, 23:38  

 _What?_  

Craig, 23:39  

 _You want me to help you with general relativity? In the fucking dead of night?_  

Kyle, 23:40  

 _I’m stuck on Q5._  

Craig, 23:40  

 _What’s wrong with this bitch I don’t want to do homework on general relativity I have enough on my plate_  

 _Did you know they’re threatening to cancel pizza Fridays in the cafeteria?_  

 _Why don’t they just put a gun to my head and get it over with_  

 _Jesus._  

Kyle, 23:41  

 _So are you saying you don’t know?_  

Craig, 23:50  

Image Attached  

 _You owe me_  

 _Big time_  

 _General relativity_  

 _Fucking asshole_  

Kyle, 23:50  

 _Omg dude you’re a lifesaver!!!_  

 _This is perfect!_  

 _Tysm_  

Craig, 23:50  

 _Whatever_  

 _Pizza Friday_  

Kyle, 23:52  

 _You got it dude!!_  

\-- 

Neither of them would describe the other as a ‘close’ friend. An ‘old’ friend was probably more accurate; they’d been friends since elementary, of course they were comfortable around each other. So it should’ve come as no surprise really that they texted each other with some frequency, especially as they shared some classes. It was perfectly natural.  

Except ‘some frequency’ actually meant that Craig texted the fiery redhead more than his own real ‘close’ friends. So much so that Clyde had once turned up at his door in the dead of night, drunk out his mind and in tears about the fact that Craig was going to abandon him for his new bestie.  

If nothing else it made Craig realise that he was  _never going to be able to shake Clyde_. He thought he could probably live with that.  

Jimmy always had something to say about it. Some playful joke void of any real malice, assuring him that Jimmy wasn’t going to have a meltdown on him. He might have a meltdown on Jimmy if the fucker didn’t stop drawing attention to it so much.  

He wasn’t the only one who liked to draw attention to it and tease him. Another person who did that lived with him, as much as he wished she didn’t.  

 “Your boyfriend’s texting you.”  

Craig scowled across the room as he tried to calmly and subtly rush for his phone before someone else could. Though his sister was making no sign of moving for the device. “He’s not my boyfriend.”  

She sneered at him in response. “Tell him that.”  

“Don’t be a fucking bitch.”  

“If he wasn’t your boyfriend then why does he text you all the time?”  

“It’s what friends do, maybe if you had any you’d know.”  

“No, I’m just not secretly in love with any of my friends.”  

“What are you two fighting about now?”  

He looked up in a panic as his mother came down the stairs, shouting out ‘nothing’ the same time Tricia answered with ‘Craig’s secret boyfriend’. The look his mother gave him had heat blossoming in his cheeks.  

“She’s being a little shit, I don’t have a secret boyfriend.”  

“I was going to say, we all know about your boyfriend. It’s not a very good secret.”  

“He’s not my boyfriend, for fucks sake!”  

“Sure he’s not.”  

The phone buzzed away in his hand before he could respond. His mother began to laugh as Tricia piped up with. “You gonna get that, or are you gonna ignore him to prove a point?”  

He didn’t justify either of them with an answer. Instead he stomped his way into the kitchen, leaning against the counter as he opened his phone and read the three new texts.  

Kyle, 15:00  

 _I’m helping Wendy out with this student council thing tomorrow during lunch_  

 _I need like an extra hand. Just to stick flyers up._  

 _Do you wanna help??_  

Craig, 15:16  

 _I can’t I have detention_  

Kyle, 15:16 

 _For what?_  

Craig, 15:16 

 _I didn’t do the physics homework_  

Kyle, 15:17 

 _???? What??? You literally helped me with it? You answered Q5???_  

Craig, 15:17 

 _Yeah and then I put the book away cause it was fucking bedtime_  

Kyle, 15:17 

 _??????????????_  

Craig, 15:17 

 _We can’t all be nerds like you_  

He ignored his mother as she came into the kitchen, no doubt having had her moment gossiping with his evil sister about him in the living room. He could practically feel the smugness radiating off her being as she moved around him while his fingers tapped away on the screen.  

“Y’know, I remember when you’d ring people you wanted to talk to. None of this texting shit.”  

“You can remember that because you’re old.”  

“Don’t give me cheek, boy.”  

Kyle, 15:20  

 _What if I talk to Miss Palmer for you?_  

Craig, 15:21  

 _What to do community service instead of jail time?_  

Kyle, 15:21  

 _Basically. Put your time to better use or whatever. I can’t imagine she wants to spend her lunch with you._  

Craig, 15:22  

 _I’m a delight_  

Kyle, 15:22  

 _You’re delusional._  

Craig, 15:22  

 _You’re the one who’s going out his way to spend his lunch with me_  

The silence on the other end began to unsettle him as he stared at the phone, waiting for some kind of response. Maybe it was too much. Maybe Kyle was second guessing it now that he realised that was what he was doing. Maybe someone else had offered to help instead and he was messaging them instead to sort something out.  

Kyle, 15:25 

 _Yeah I am._  

 _But you’re a pretty big improvement to my usual lunchtime company._  

He knew that Kyle was saying it because their usual lunchtime company included Eric Cartman, and even after years of being what everyone else considered best friends the pair still hated each other’s guts, allegedly. Even though he knew that, it didn’t stop his heart skipping a beat and a smile tugging at the corners of his lips like some kind of gay movie.  

Craig, 15:26  

 _Alright you’ve twisted my arm_  

 _I’ll put up flyers with you_  

 _Golly you know how to show a guy a good time_  

Kyle, 15:27  

 _I aim to please._  

Craig, 15:27  

 _Your aim’s off._  

Kyle, 15:27 

 _Asshole._  

 _\--_  

It didn’t surprise him that Kyle successfully wrangled it so Miss Palmer agreed to let Craig out of detention in order to help the student council. He’d made a point the night before: she probably didn’t want to spend her lunchtime with Craig. That didn’t mean that it was  _better_ to be suffering through one of Wendy’s instructional lectures on what their plans were and how they were going to do it.  

He didn’t understand why she had to make everything so fucking complicated.  

Craig, 12:33  

 _So they cancelled pizza Fridays. I hope you’re happy._  

He felt a swell of joy when Kyle reached into his pocket and withdrew his phone. The redhead shot him a disapproving look, but tucked his flyers under his arm in order to respond.  

Kyle, 12:35 

 _Why is it my fault?_  

Craig, 12:35  

 _I tried to warn you. Tried to get you to petition for it or something. But you didn’t care. All you cared about was general relativity._  

Kyle, 12:36 

 _Why didn’t you petition for it?_  

Craig, 12:36 

 _I told you I have shit to do_  

Kyle, 12:36 

 _Bullshit._  

Craig, 12:37 

 _Yeah that. Shit to do._  

Kyle, 12:37 

 _You’re not funny._  

Craig, 12:38 

 _Then why are you laughing??? Caught. Out._  

“Oh my god are you texting each other right now?” Wendy demanded. “You’re literally stood right next to each other.”  

“Sorry, Wendy. I didn’t wanna interrupt you.”  

She folded her arms across her chest at Kyle’s halfassed answer. “If you’re that concerned wait till after I’m finished before talking.” 

“In Kyle’s defence, I don’t care if I interrupt you, so texting’s a good compromise really.”  

“I’m sorry you find it all so tedious,  _Craig_ . You’re  _welcome_ for getting you out of detention.”  

Before he had a chance to respond with a scathing remark, Kyle was speaking over him. Probably trying to avoid an argument or be banished from the room.  

“I’ll take him with me to go start. Just follow the instructions you gave me yesterday, yeah?”  

“Please. Thanks, Kyle.”  

They fled the room pretty quickly, Craig being dragged out by his elbow as he flipped Wendy off, though the girl was used to it by this point and had already returned to briefing her underlings. Kyle guided him through the hallways towards a spot where he checked his phone that he had the right one before he split the flyers between them.  

“So why does Wendy need so many people putting up flyers? She had a small army in there.”  

“I think she wanted to cover as much ground as possible in as short a time as possible. Sooner we finish sooner we eat lunch.”  

“Sounds fake, but okay.”  

“I do appreciate you doing this by the way. Your alternative wasn’t much better, but still…”  

“Yeah, well, you’re welcome.”  

The thing with real life conversations was that they weren’t via text. You couldn’t erase what you said and put something better. You couldn’t change your mind on saying things. They didn’t come as easily or flow as naturally for Craig.  

It left him feeling a little anxious about saying something obnoxiously dumb and left him not saying anything at all.  

But that was okay. Kyle didn’t seem to mind about his silence, instead concentrating on sticking up Wendy’s flyers and instructing Craig on where he wanted them to go. It must’ve only took them fifteen minutes before they’d covered the area Wendy gave them and they were heading towards the cafeteria.  

“I can’t believe you didn’t do the physics homework.”  

Craig smirked down at the redhead. “I can’t believe you’re surprised.”  

“You were literally doing it when I spoke to you.”  

“No, you asked me for question five. So I did question five.”  

A small smile spread across Kyle’s lips. “You’re such a big softie.”  

“I resent that. You take that back.”  

“You are. You can hide it as much as you want, but it’s pretty obvious, dude.”  

“Don’t you  _dude_ me.”  

They arrived at the doors to the cafeteria, slowing to a stop outside. Craig turned to see Kyle already facing him, a strained smile on his face as he shoved his hands into his pockets. Craig found himself mirroring the position.  

“So with pizza Friday’s being cancelled, I guess I’ll have to-?!”  

“Kyle!”  

The pair both turned together to see Bebe rushing towards them, eyes wide and manic as she approached and practically threw herself at the redhead, gripping his arm tightly and completely blanking Craig.  

“I need your help! Some asshole has put Red’s gym bag on top of the lockers and we can’t get it down, they’re hanging around waiting for us to try jumping up for it – I’ve seen them do it before, the stupid perverts! Can you come help?”  

“You’re not that much shorter than me, Bebe.”  

“I know, but maybe with you there they’ll leave us alone.”  

Kyle looked to Craig, eyes wide and searching. “Craig, could you-?”  

“Nope,” he said the word with a pop, looking down to see the blonde at least looking a little guilty. “No can do. Red doesn’t want to breathe the same airspace as me right now.”  

“What? Why?”  

He shrugged lightly. Bebe scowled up at him.  

“Because his best friend is a fucking dickwad, that’s why. Look – it doesn’t matter. Can you come help?”  

“Of course, Bebe. I’ll-!”  

“Great! C’mon!”  

Craig turned and pushed open the doors to the cafeteria without looking back, not wanting to see the probably pathetic look in the redhead’s eyes as he was dragged off to deal with whatever Bebe would have him do after helping Red. Apparently Kyle was still a sucker for helping out damsels in distress.  

He was half way through his burger when his phone began to vibrate and he opened it up to read the new message. He wouldn’t have been able to stop the smile that graced his lips if he tried.  

Kyle, 13:12  

 _Sorry I couldn’t say thank you for the help, but thanks._  

Craig, 13:13  

 _Anytime._  

\-- 

Craig, 18:43 

 _Stop sending me requests to help you in Bubble Saga_  

 _I’m not playing it and I’m not giving you an extra life_  

 _I’m not falling down that rabbit hole._  

Kyle, 18:47 

 _Please Craig_  

 _All I want are extra balls_  

 _Won’t you share your balls with me_  

Craig, 18:48  

 _No I won’t_  

 _You don’t deserve them_  

Kyle, 18:48 

 _Please??_  

 _I’m so hungry_  

 _For balls_  

Craig, 18:49  

 _Kenny if you’re not even gonna pretend to text like Kyle don’t messenger from his phone_  

Kyle, 18:50  

 _Its not Kenny it’s totally Kyle_  

 _After ur dick_  

 _;) ;) ;) ;)_  

Craig, 18:50  

 _Wow I’m totally convinced I was so wrong you’re totally definitely Kyle_  

Kyle, 18:50  

 _uwu_  

Craig, 18:51  

 _Excuse me while I go vomit._  

Kyle, 18:55  

 _Omg_  

 _Dude_  

 _I’m so sorry_  

 _He took my phone while I was helping Stan with food_  

 _I’m gonna kill him._  

Craig, 18:56 

 _You act like I’ve never been exposed to Kenny before_  

 _Oh no he’s upset my delicate sensibilities_  

 _Whatever am I going to do??_  

Kyle, 18:57 

 _Don’t be an asshole._  

\-- 

Craig jumped out his skin as someone came crashing down into the seat beside him at detention. He turned to see a dark haired, fierce woman sat to his right with fury in her eyes and the weight of the world on her shoulders. It was a bit like a bomb ready to explode. He was torn between his usual apathetic nonchalance of  _not asking questions_ and a burning curiosity for  _gossip_.  

The latter won out.  

“Why are you in detention, Testaburger?”  

“Eric Cartman, that’s why,” she ground out with a scowl. “He just thinks he’s so much better than everyone else, doesn’t he?”  

He didn’t want to call her out on hypocrisy. But he could mentally call her out on it.  

“What are you doing here?”  

He shrugged. “Apparently Mrs Li thinks homework isn’t optional. I disagreed.”  

She gave him an exasperated look. “She’s not wrong.”  

“In your opinion maybe.”  

The phone in his pocket buzzed, and he cursed as he fumbled for it as discretely as he could. The teacher at the front of the class was far too engrossed in his book to really care about what they were doing at least.  

Kyle, 13:05  

 _I miss pizza Fridays already._  

Craig, 13:05  

 _You should take it up with the student council._  

 _Speaking of the student council, did you know Wendy Testaburger gets detentions?_  

Kyle, 13:06  

 _If she’s there why don’t you take it up with the student council?_  

Craig, 13:06  

 _Sounds like a lot of work. I’ll pass._  

Kyle, 13:06  

 _Jackass._  

When he glanced up to see what the teen in question was doing, he was surprised to see her watching him with a gentle smile on her face. It was a smile he’d seen on her before; when she was with the infamous Super Best Friends, watching them interact with that fondness that comes from years of knowing someone.  

It unsettled him. It probably showed how much it unsettled him on his face given the quirk of her brow as she spoke the words that would send his brain into full panic mode.  

“You’ve got it pretty bad. Anyone told you that?”  

He was actually pretty proud of his poker face. He rolled his eyes as if to say  _yes, it’s ridiculous_ , but before he got a chance to speak his phone was vibrating again and his eyes were habitually drawn to it, turning it on quickly to glance at what the text was.  

It was Clyde. Nothing important.  

When he turned back he realised his mistake and fumbled through the weak reply of: “Eat shit.”  

“Have you ever thought of asking him out?”  

“Have you ever thought of minding your own business?”  

Wendy rolled her eyes, but there was a coy smile on her face as she said: “You didn’t hear it from me, but I’m pretty confident he’ll say yes.”  

She left him with that, pulling out her textbooks as she began on the homework assignments for the day. He glanced down at the text again, opening it fully to address what his friend had been after.  

Clyde, 13:10  

 _Kyle said you’re with Wendy. Get her to bring back pizza Fridays._  

It sent a little spark of warmth running through him knowing that Kyle was talking about him. It sent even more warmth through him to spend the next twenty minutes annoying Wendy more and more about bringing back pizza Fridays.  

\-- 

Wendy’s words stuck with him.  

They stuck with him all through last period, and all through the bus ride home. He was positively  _dazed_ as he walked back to his house, grunting at his dad who greeted him from his place at the dining table.  

He was so fucking dazed he accidentally put gravy in his cup at dinner. The wide eyed looks that his family gave him had him picking up his plate wordlessly and rushing up to his room before any of them could comment on the ugly shade of red in his cheeks.  

He typed out a message before erasing it again, groaning and dropping the phone on the table. He had been torn between replying to the usual drivel that Kyle had sent him with taking Wendy’s advice, or mindless words.  

She was such a  _know-it-all_ . Just because she was right about mostly everything didn’t mean she was right  _all the time_. Where did she even get off on?  

Except she  _knew Kyle_ . They were  _friends_. If she was going to be right about anything…  

He sucked in a breath, grabbed his phone, and typed out a message without releasing his breath till he’d pressed send.  

Craig, 21:40  

 _I know it’s a bit late to be asking but_  

 _Do you have plans tomorrow?_  

He spent the next fifteen minutes going through his life choices up until that point and regretting almost each and every one of them.  

Kyle, 21:55  

 _What’s up?_  

Craig, 21:56 

 _I just_  

 _Was wondering if you wanted to come to the cinema or something idk_  

 _There’s this new horror movie out that’s meant to be really good_  

 _Or we can go see something else you know me I just like the cinema_  

Kyle, 21:57 

 _A movie?_  

Craig, 21:58  

 _You don’t have to if you’re busy dude_  

Kyle, 21:58  

 _No that’s not what I meant_  

 _I’d like to we just never hang out outside of like school so I wasn’t expecting it_  

 _Not that’s it’s weird or anything we’re friends after all_  

 _I mean I think so_  

 _You’re pretty cool._  

Craig, 21:20  

 _Yeah right_  

Kyle, 21:20  

 _Let me just message Stan to see what time he wants me to go round and then I’ll let you know a time?_  

 _Unless you want me to invite him I guess?_  

Craig, 21:21  

 _No I was thinking more of a me and you thing_  

Kyle, 21:21  

 _Right sure yeah hang on_  

The waiting was the worst. Sitting around expecting a message back. He probably should’ve gone to do something to occupy his mind but instead he sat there with his phone face up on the desk next to him drumming his fingers against the wood like some kind of love-sick loser. Which he was. 

He grabbed it as soon as it buzzed, twice, but forced himself to take a breath before opening the message. He didn’t want to come off as desperate, right?  

There were two messages. From two different people.  

 **Kyle**   

_So I should be free sometime after…_

**Stan**  

_Kyle’s too chicken shit to ask but I…_

Curiosity got the better of him. Again.  

Stan, 21:27  

 _Kyle’s too chicken shit to ask but I’m a good friend so I’ll ask for him._  

 _You guys gonna go on a date or what??_  

Craig was pretty sure his brain had a full on meltdown. He closed the phone as he covered his face with his hands, groaning into his palms before he willed himself to open Kyle’s message, completely blanking Stan. The other boy should be used to it by now at least.  

Kyle, 21:28  

 _So I should be free sometime after 15:00. Is that okay?_  

Craig, 21:30  

 _Perfect. I’ll come to yours for 16:00?_  

Kyle, 21:31  

 _Yeah sounds good!_  

Craig, 21:31  

 _Great. It’s a date._  

 _Just in case that wasn’t obvious_  

 _The date part_  

 _If that’s okay_  

Kyle, 21:32  

 _That’s perfect._  

\-- 

Space Asshole, 08:12  

 _Kyle_  

 _I need your help_  

Gingersnaps, 08:13  

 _What is it?_  

Space Asshole, 08:13  

 _I forgot the physics homework can I copy yours_  

Gingersnaps, 08:13  

 _Dude what the fuck_  

 _How are you passing this class?_  

 _With good grades and everything?_  

 _How???_  

Space Asshole, 08:14  

 _Magic._  

 _Srs tho can I?_  

Gingersnaps, 08:14  

 _No do your own homework_  

Space Asshole, 08:14  

 _Kyle_  

 _Babe_  

 _Please_  

 _I’ll do anything_  

Gingersnaps, 08:15  

 _You can’t sweet talk me into this._  

Space Asshole, 08:15  

 _I can try_  

Gingersnaps, 08:15  

 _Next time you’re coming round and we’re doing the homework together._  

Space Asshole, 08:16  

 _A study date? Really?_  

 _That’s so straight._  

Gingersnaps, 08:16  

 _We’re going to actually study._  

Space Asshole, 08:17  

 _That’s even WORSE_  

 _So are you gonna let me copy your homework?_  

Gingersnaps, 08:18  

 _One time._  

Space Asshole, 08:18  

 _Yes_  

 _Thank you_  

 _You’re the best_  

Gingersnaps, 08:18  

 _You’re so embarrassing._  

Space Asshole, 08:19  

 _;)_  

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna do my best to get each day finished!! Some of them are only half done at the moment but if I submit them late then I guess that's just the way it's gotta be huh? 
> 
> (Craig in this gets detention for exactly the same reason I had detention every week in school: lazy)


End file.
